I Love You, Man

These are nice words by Lindsey Graham about John McCain. It's not often you hear a man say "I love him to death" about a friend. I like seeing these men express their emotions to the public.

Buffalo Bills Fans (Men Fighting, Men Drinking, Men Wrestling, Men Jumping Through Tables)

Deadspin occasionally posts videos of Buffalo Bills fans doing wild and crazy things. They recently posted "The Year in Bills Fans" video, which is really a compilation of men fighting, drinking, wrestling, and jumping through tables. Around the 1:30 mark, men fight near a grill and you can hear someone saying "Watch the grill, watch the grill." Priorities!

Does this video accurately represent the behavior of 70,000 Bills fans who attend games? Of course not, but that doesn't matter so much. This is clickable stuff, whether you click on it because you find it funny, or curious, or want to condemn it, or analyze it, or just be a voyeur. Most people aren't interested in videos of people tailgating quietly while having a few beers. "Bills fans gone mild" is boring. Bills fans destroying tables is more like it. It's in the mold of Jackass and I suppose it's what some guys do to get attention. I've written before about celebrities and the pursuit of attention. The Bills fans who make it to Deadspin are a good example of ordinary men doing stunts to gain attention. Their actions could be a way of getting attention in their peer group, or in hopes of ending up in someone's social media feed. Or maybe they're just drunk and having fun. If the antics make it to the Internet, people click for laughs or jeers or, in this case, for basic sociological analysis. "Here we are now entertain us" is a more relevant lyric than ever in our 24-7-365 media world.

Kleenex Commercial Accurately Points Out That Boys Care About Feelings

This commercial caught my eye this morning. A boy gives a brief sociological speech about how boys aren't all about being loud and immature. In fact, he explains, boys care about feelings. He proves it by handing a tissue to a girl who is crying about the first day of school. Not bad. I might have written the commercial a different way. Imagine the boy handing a tissue to another boy--that would have been a welcome image. As the actual commercial plays out, it could be read as a young fella helping out a young damsel in distress. It's not a perfect commercial by any stretch, but what commercial is without its flaws and critics? This one isn't bad because it acknowledges the simple truth that boys care about feelings.

Between Good and Ghetto

Do you like Elijah Anderson's work? Were you influenced by Patricia Hill Collins? Are you interested in the concept of "doing gender"? Want to read an excellent ethnography? Are you concerned about violence in America's inner-cities? Do you want to learn about the complicated conditions in which African-American girls come of age in poor neighborhoods? If the answer to any of these questions is "yes," then I recommend Between Good and Ghetto by Nikki Jones.

Many of us try to write with race, class, gender, and sexuality in mind. It is easier attempted than achieved. Jones accomplishes the task as she shows how girls and young women navigate violent neighborhoods (and in some cases, violent relationships). In an effort to be "good," girls carefully avoid dangerous places. They stay home to avoid trouble and sometimes limit their close friendships, because being a good friend means fighting occasionally on behalf of a friend. A "ghetto girl" develops an identity as a fighter and gains respect and status for her ability to fight, and consequently can survive in "male spaces" and dangerous places. The lives of girls are characterized by fluidity between and within the expectations of good and ghetto (p. 155).

Jones spent three years doing fieldwork in Philadelphia. She interviewed males and females and made observations in several places: homes, neighborhoods, high school, the trolley, court, and more. The book offers astute sociological analysis. It's a story located within urban sociology. Jones was encouraged by journal reviewers to locate her work in the criminological literature on gender and crime--in effect, that would have meant treating her subjects as deviants and victims. But she told the stories of African-American girls in the way that she wanted: within the perspective of urban sociology and Black feminist thought. She describes the circumstances of poor, urban, Black girls. She shows how power dynamics permeate girls' relationships with men. Jones writes: "With every new story, my own frustration over what is allowed to happen to Black girls in general, and to poor, Black girls in particular, soars. These girls are made more vulnerable because of their race, age, and economic status" (p. 161). "The battle for respect, dignity, and positive life chances," she writes, "is not one these girls should have to fight on their own" (p. 162).

The book has me thinking about violence in new ways, and has challenged my thinking about normative gender expectations. It gives nuanced meaning to terms like "ghetto," "inner-city," and "baby daddy," words that are often carelessly used and misunderstood in everyday life and in popular culture. This book will help me be a better teacher in the three courses I teach most: Introduction to Sociology, Social Psychology, and Race & Ethnicity. Having said that, it would seem to benefit anyone teaching any course in Sociology.

Doing Gender

"Doing Gender" is a classic sociological concept developed by Candace West and Don Zimmerman. Their article "Doing Gender" was published in Gender & Society (Vol. 1, No. 2, June 1987, pp. 125-151). Here are summary points about doing gender, based on their article.

1. "Doing gender” means that gender is a routine accomplishment in everyday life.

2. We “do gender” every day, all the time. It's an ongoing activity. We can’t avoid doing gender.

3. We do gender in interaction. 

4. Gender is not simply what a person is, it is something that a person does, in interaction with others. It is a product of social interaction. A production. A construction. A social construction.

5. And we do gender knowing that we will be judged by others. In other words, we are accountable for our gender performances. In this video, sociologist C.J. Pascoe brilliantly explains how the boundaries of masculinity are policed in social interaction in high school. (If video link to interview doesn't work, use this link to watch Pascoe discuss the use of homophobic taunts to police masculinity in interaction). 

6. If we behave outside the boundaries of normative gender scripts, we risk being judged harshly by others.

7. Keep in mind that, from an early age, we learn about “doing gender.”

8. Little girls are taught to value their appearance more so than little boys.

9. Little boys are taught different things than little girls.

10. “Be a big boy” and “Be a big girl” are different messages that convey different meanings about “appropriate” gender behaviors. This means not only "don't be a baby" but to learn how to "competently" be a boy or girl.

11. In this process, boys and girls begin to monitor their own behavior and the behavior of their peers in terms of whether the gender behavior is “appropriate.” (Appropriate, according to normative gender behaviors). The authors write: "And note, to "do" gender is not always to live up to normative conceptions of femininity or masculinity; it is to engage in behavior at the risk of gender assessment" (p. 136). 

12. Sociologist Tristan Bridges gives an excellent example of how we do gender with wallets and purses.

13. Doing gender can result in social stratification: if, in doing gender, men are being dominant and women are being submissive, this results in power differences and hierarchy!

14. Those who behave outside the lines of gender norms are, in effect, challenging the gender status quo.

The concept "doing gender" came to mind when I saw a wedding party at Erie Basin Marina in Buffalo. The bridesmaids wore bright pink dresses, and the groomsmen wore black tuxedos. I took a picture while walking by a wedding party. If you look closely, you'll notice two brides in the picture. Turns out two wedding parties were at the Marina for photographs. Both brides are wearing traditional white wedding gowns. Think of many weddings you've been to: all eyes are on the bride. It's her day. She's the princess, he's the prince who waits for her to walk down the aisle. Quite often, the bride's father "gives her away" to her new husband. It's all an exercise in normative gender roles. In that context, it's interesting to think about same-sex marriages and to contemplate how same-sex marriages challenge gender norms.