Wednesday, August 1, 2018

A Review of Five Guys

You know you're going to enjoy lunch when you walk into your local Five Guys to the amazing sounds of "No Matter What" by Badfinger. I swear this song gets better with time. My two kids joined me for lunch, ages 10 and 7. We ordered three little cheeseburgers. We received pleasant customer service. My 7-year-old likes his burgers with "two bottom buns," something I didn't even know you could order at fast food places until about a month ago. The person at the counter indulged our request, and, sure enough, his burger came with two bottom buns. Little cheeseburgers come in at 610 calories. I crushed most of mine while listening to Supertramp's "The Logical Song"--a song that still speaks to me, a song that cuts through me each time Roger Hodgson begs "Please tell me who I am." I should probably have myself figured out at age 45, but I don't. I'm still searching for something intangible, and even if by luck I find myself late in life, I will always love this song. I digress.

I can't tell you the disappointment I feel at restaurants when I order a burger to be cooked medium. They usually arrive overcooked. What I like about Five Guys is you don't go through the motions of ordering your burger to be a cooked a certain temperature. They cook them how they cook them. And they cook them delicious. In an era of $15 burgers at gastropubs, I'm good with this $5.49 little dynamite from Five Guys. My 10-year-old demolished his entire burger, and my 7-year-old ate 80% of his, gifting the remaining portion to his older brother. They told our kids in preschool that sharing is caring. And let me tell you the message was received.

I ordered one Little Fry. I lied to myself that I would only eat 3-4 fries anyway, so the smallest size would suffice. The three of us quickly devoured the Little Fry order (a total of 540 calories). I guess there's something to be said for portion control. I wasn't stuffed after eating. The fries, by the way, were excellent. I rarely enjoy fries from any fast food establishment. Fries are too often limp, cold, too salty. These fries, however, are solid across the board. 

As we finished our meal, Cream's "White Room" played, reminding me that Eric Clapton is a genius. I'm listening to it now on YouTube. Jack Bruce was simply terrific on lyrics and Ginger Baker did a fine job pounding the skins (I think that's drum lingo that can be used by mid-lifers like me, but I'm not sure). 

We hit up this Five Guys location (McKinley Parkway in Hamburg, about a mile away from where the Buffalo Bills play at New Era Field) once every 6 weeks or so and have yet to be disappointed. It's a tidy establishment. It's often the case that restaurants don't bother to clean their bathrooms but it appeared as though the men's bathroom had been recently cleaned.

In all, it was a superb lunch, no complaints. We shall return, without a doubt.

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